How to Write a Dating Site Profile or Personals Ad
If you have movie star good looks then your photo is the most effective tool in attracting dates. For the rest of us, it is our profile! Profile writing is not dissimilar to writing advertising copy. You are after all trying to market yourself as an attractive dating prospect.
You may think that most advertisements usually are all hype, and there may be something to that. If you have ever been seduced by an ad only to be disappointed in the product you will feel justified in that opinion. So there is a difference in writing ads for dating sites; they must be honest! This is the crucial aspect you should bear in mind. It is no good writing a profile that attracts loads of replies, only to disappoint once the meeting takes place!
This doesn't mean though that some sound ad writing principles can't give you an edge over the competition. Everyone has good qualities. These are the selling points that you need to draw attention to in your ad/profile. You can use some very effective techniques to do this, and if you are honest you won't be setting up false expectations. So lets look at some things you can do.
Before you start get together a list of your good qualities. As many as you can think of. Are you good looking? Do you work out? Can you sing/dance/act? Are you creative/artist/writer? This is what you want to communicate. We will see how to put this into your profile a bit later.
Now write down what you are looking for. Do you want a long term partner or casual fun? Do you want to have deep and meaningful discussions or lots of exciting days/nights out? Do you want someone short or tall? Interested in children? Think about your ideal partner.
Now we are ready to start writing. The first thing you need is a good headline. If you don't make someone want to read your profile, you might as well not write one. Look for a way to stand out; do you have a good sense of humour? Then write a funny headline to prove it. "Boring people need not apply", or "Don't let someone else get me!". Are you sincere and genuine? "Caution: You are about to pass up a genuine Man/Woman". Are you high energy? "Can you handle the excitement?" Issue a challenge, "Show me why you are not just a pretty face" or "Do you dare risk falling in love?" While everyone else is writing "Sincere fun non-smoker seeks like minded companion" you will set yourself apart.
Now for the body. Structure your profile like this: if you are a man, write about what you want in a woman in the first paragraph. If you are a woman, write about yourself first. Whether its conditioning or our genes, we tend to behave this way. Women want to be chased, are reluctant to make the first move; men like to initiate, feel in control. Men are attracted, women like to be attractive.
Write so that you paint a picture of the two of you together doing something that portrays your good points. "While we are laughing over a glass of wine, we will at the same time be deepening our communication." "As we dance the night away, we look into each other's eyes and feel the passion we share." Let the other person's imagination get involved so that they picture the two of you together.
Try to include a "testimonial". Quote someone else talking about your qualities. "My first girlfriend said she really appreciated how I took her feelings into account." "My ex-boyfriend told me he never doubted my loyalty."
A bit of innocently suggestive language is also an effective tool. Ladies: "I am going to make it hard for you to want to be with any other woman." Guys: "Be the woman that, deep inside you, you have always dared to be." You haven't said anything rude but the suggestion has been planted! Try to think of your own, and make them subtle.
The last paragraph should contain an instruction to act. "Don't wait, contact me now. I promise to reply." "Don't pass up the chance for a real adventure." "Don't risk the chance that someone else will get me first." "Reply now, this may be what we both have been waiting for for so long."
By following these principles, you put yourself ahead of the competition, present yourself in an attractive light, but don't set up disappointment. You should soon see the replies to your ads start to roll in, and when you meet you will have a better chance of finding what you seek!